The Monday Read: It's a jarring visual, but Michigan has proven to be a shell of its former self

Newsflash: Michigan's not as good as they were last year. That's certainly not a hot take, but there's a difference in getting beat and getting beaten up like the Wolverines did in the 31-12 loss to Texas. It showed what happens when a team like Michigan, which operates without much margin for error, gets a shot of error straight to the face for 60 minutes. It's been over a year since the Wolverines lost at all, and you really have to go back to the College Football Playoff semifinal loss against Georgia in 2022 to see them get big boy'd like they did on Saturday. 

The Monday Read was particularly stunned at how Texas handled the money downs versus Michigan's approach. Texas converted seven of their first eight third downs including conversions of seven, 10 and 13 yards to gain. Quinn Ewers made plays, whether it was a perfect hole shot to Isaiah Bond, or an uncanny scramble with all hell breaking loose, or a beautiful throw with excellent pocket navigation to Matthew Golden. Each were backbreaking to a Michigan defense accustomed to getting off the field when necessary. Opponents were 10-110 on third-and-7+ last season against the Wolverines. 

Michigan's offense went 3-12 on third, and had two fourth-down conversions in garbage time down 31-6. It only converted one third down in the first half at all. They should have had a second, but tight end Colston Loveland inexplicably dropped a completion trying to tuck it in and Texas recovered before using the short field to put the game out of reach by the intermission at 24-3. That's a big deficit, but it feels like an extremely wide chasm when you consider how haphazardly Michigan's offense operates when it gets a negative game script.

The most jarring failures on the ground came when quarterback Alex Orji came into the game as a change of pace QB. Orji was the presumed starter up until just about Michigan's season opener, and reports throughout camp showed that Orji's inconsistencies in camp led to his inability to establish himself as QB1. It may seem like he's in the same role as last year when he backed up JJ McCarthy, but a little tweak in his usage goes a long way to explain where Michigan is so far in 2024. 

Orji played 16 snaps at quarterback in 2023 --15 of them were rushing attempts. None of Orji's carries in 2023 ever came on a third down. He was an early down luxury changeup, not the guy Michigan had to call upon when they had to have it. Of the 67 third down rushing attempts Michigan had last year that were neither a sack, scramble nor a kneel down, Michigan's three running backs split the load as you would assume. Blake Corum had 28 such runs, Donovan Edwards had 15 and Kaleel Mullings had 10. Michigan converted on 16 of Corum's third-down runs, twice on Edwards' and eight times on Mullings'. 

Orji has three of Michigan's five non-sack third down rushing attempts early on in 2024, one of which was a successful third-and-6 against Fresno State, but Orji was twice unsuccessful against Texas. 

On a third-and-5, Texas Edge Anthony Hill Jr. put himself in position to tackle both Orji and running back Benjamin Hall: 

And on a third-and-3, his pulling guard got caught in traffic, forcing him to slow down approaching the line of scrimmage and redirect right into the teeth of Texas' defensive front. 

It's no secret what Orji is in the game to do at any time, but the point of Michigan's attitude is it doesn't matter whether you, I or any of the 110,000 people in the Big House recognize that it's going to be a run -- Michigan should be able to run it successfully any way. 

That's the attitude of their former offensive lineman head coach and the pedigree of a unit that should be the next in line after back-to-back Joe Moore Awards. But Orji is not behind McCarthy any more; he's behind Davis Warren, who hasn't shown McCarthy's ability to be efficient in the passing game (his QBR was nearly a bang average 47.6) nor can he extend plays with his legs when all else fails. The offensive line has clearly slipped in play, and pass blocking concerns that did pop up intermittently last season are back in spades with a new unit. 

It should be noted, it's hard to run on third down -- or any down -- when you're down 21 points as Michigan was basically the entire second half. That's the thing about complementary football: What happens when the defense can't complement you as well as it did last year due to its own dip in competence from last season and an uptick in opponent quality? Michigan didn't play a team in the same stratosphere of this year's Texas team until mid-November. This year? The Wolverines have USC and Washington on the slate by Week 6. 

Intuitively you knew the Wolverines were going to be worse. But there's a difference in thinking it and seeing it for yourself. 

Notable quotable

If you haven't seen Thomas Hammock's emotional outpouring after Northern Illinois' upset win over Notre Dame as a 28-point underdog, there is no time like the present. It's real that's what sports is all about type stuff. 

But it's what he said to Matt Fortuna of "The Inside Zone" on the bus home that will stick with The Monday Read. 

"I'm like, 'Hey man, slow down,'" Hammock said he told the bus driver. "Let's enjoy this a little bit more."

It's a simple thought, but we all need to slow down and enjoy the wins in life whether no matter how big they are. 

Heisman performance of week 

I see your Ashton Jeanty and raise you Cam Skattebo. The Arizona State running back had a true throwback performance with 33 carries and 262 yards in a 30-23 win. 

Sources tell The Monday Read that the kids these days call this aura:

Big number of the week: 121 

USC's defense may well and truly be back after shutting out Utah State 48-0. The Aggies aren't an offensive juggernaut, but baby steps in the return to defensive competence must be acknowledged by the Trojans, who have not shut out an opponent since 2011. Since blanking UCLA 50-0 back then, 121 FBS teams have pitched a shutout. Welcome back to the land of the goose egg, USC. 

Big man touchdown of the week 

Take a look at all 295 pounds of Arizona State's C.J. Fite getting the ball across the plain. The big fella has some serious dexterity.  

Gag job of the week 

Shoutout to Arkansas for really snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Here's a non-exhaustive list of notes on the things the Hogs did to not pay off a 21-7 lead in a game in which they finished with a 648-385 advantage in total yards. 

• Muffed punt
• Missed 41-yard field goal 
• Turnover on downs with 6:45 left 
• Got burned a double-pass trick play where they weren't really lined up 
• Dropped interception
• Took a sack in overtime then missed a 46-yard field goal 
• Unnecessary roughness to erase third-and-long in double overtime 
• Missed a wide-open touchdown on a wheel route 

Quarterback Taylen Green was a bright spot, and they really might have something in the Boise State transfer, but yikes did the bungle this one. 

Turnover prop of the week 

If "Stone Cold" Steve Austin is an alum of your school, is there any better way to honor him than popping bottles (of water) on the sideline after a turnover? 

Jumbotron moment of the week 

The Monday Read ventures to guess Kirk Ferentz -- fresh off suspension -- has never before and will never again be played into Kinnick Stadium by 50 Cent, but there's a first time for everything. 

Locker room celly of the week 

Last week, USC's players hit a "Get the Gat" celebration in the locker room after beating LSU, dancing on the proverbial grave of the Tigers with the theme song to their 2019 title run. This week, it's Nebraska's turn, blaring Shedeur Sanders' single "Perfect Timing" over the speakers in the locker room. 

The song had a touch of controversy to it this weekend, though, when it was reported that Deion Sanders asked the Colorado band to play it en lieu of the fight song after Shedeur scores touchdowns. That is not exactly the case. 

"Coach Prime never told the band they couldn't play the fight song," a CU spokesperson said in a statement to CBS Sports. "For sake of trying new things, for multiple players, we play a few seconds of specific songs after they score. On a touchdown, the fight song plays after the extra point, which has always been part of the sequence. On a FG, after a few seconds of a song for [kicker] Alejandro Mata, the fight song plays."

Meal of the week 

Miso glazed black cod collar on grilled lettuce with zhug on the side at mediterranean restaurant Theodora in Brooklyn. They cook it and all their seafood over an open flame on a mangal-style grill. 

The Monday Read regards Theodora as the best restaurant in New York City. The dry aged fish also on the menu are to die for, and it's worth going home smelling like a bonfire.  

What The Monday Read is excited for in Week 3

They're much earlier than usual, but the Apple Cup and the Civil War are on the menu next week, and the newly minted Big Ten teams better watch themselves against their in-state Pac-2 brethren. Oregon State in particular would love nothing better than to prove that Oregon's shakiness in the trenches isn't a fluke.