Ole Miss coach Lane Kiffin swallowed his keyboard shortly after 8 ET Saturday night.
That was about the time Ohio State started boat racing Tennessee in the last of four blowouts in the first round of the expanded 12-team College Football Playoff.
That, thankfully, was the beginning of the end of Kiffin's rants against the machine. The coach of a three-loss SEC team that lost at home to Kentucky couldn't help himself in criticizing the non-competitive nature of the first round.
He wasn't alone, of course, but never has so much outrage been expended regarding higher seeds winning at home, basically doing exactly what they were supposed to do. That's basically what occurred this weekend.
Sorry to burst your bubble, Lane, but what happened over the weekend has been going on for 10 years. The CFP's previous 20 first-round (semifinal) games were decided by an average of three scores (17.85 points). The four first-round games this year were won by an average of 19.25 points. Only seven of the 24 have been decided by single digits.
That's football, dude. We can talk about byes and seeding another time.
Indiana deserved to be in the CFP as much as SMU as much as Tennessee. Clemson at least won the ACC, which suddenly is out the competition after both its teams were eliminated.
Meanwhile, the SEC is down to two representatives -- Georgia and Texas -- although both are salty as hell at this point. In that sense, it might just mean less. The last time the SEC missed the championship game in consecutive seasons was 2004 and 2005.
The top-heavy Big Ten in the regular season is making the final eight top-heavy, too, with Ohio State, Penn State and Oregon left in the field. At most, two can advance to the semifinals. Just like the SEC.
Someone, somewhere will always be keeping track.
So what are we to make of the quarterfinals bracket now? It is chalky as heck after the first round, but that doesn't mean these matchups aren't great.
Rose Bowl: (8) Ohio State vs. (1) Oregon
A traditional Rose Bowl looms ... well, traditional if you remember that a year and a half ago there was a Pac-12 and Oregon was in it.
Still, the Ducks-Buckeyes Big Ten rematch might be the most compelling game of the entire tournament. Ohio State followed its worst game of the Ryan Day era with its best game of the season against Tennessee. Now, the Buckeyes are a one-point favorite against the No. 1 seed, who they, of course, lost to by a point two months ago.
In the moment, they have cleared a mental hurdle the size of Cleveland. The last (gangsta) image of the first round was former Alabama center/now injured Buckeye Seth McLaughlin smoking a cigar during the Tennessee win.
How hard now can it be to beat Oregon? Will Howard made one teeny spatial awareness mistake in that first game. He also happens to be at the top of his game again after Tennessee (24 of 29 passing, 311 yards, two touchdowns).
Look what happens when you don't run the ball between the tackles into the middle of the line with some of the most talented receivers and backs in the country.
Sugar Bowl: (7) Notre Dame vs. (2) Georgia
Notre Dame has put on a master class in flushing the memory of a bad loss. The Fighting Irish basically couldn't afford to lose after that Week 2 fiasco against Northern Illinois. Now, it needs to win the big one it hasn't in at least 30 years.
The Irish's 11-game winning streak since NIU gets a test in the Sugar Bowl. Georgia has won a record-pacing four consecutive playoff games. The Bulldogs last two postseason games have been the two biggest blowouts in FBS postseason history -- by 58 against TCU in the 2023 CFP National Championship and by 60 over Florida State in last year's Orange Bowl.
That's ignoring the biggest personnel news of the playoff. Georgia quarterback Carson Beck is reportedly undergoing surgery on his throwing elbow. That means the Bulldogs will sink or swim with backup Gunner Stockton, who sparked the offense in the second half of the SEC Championship Game against Texas.
On the surface, Georgia looks vulnerable. Its running game is its least productive in at least 10 years. And Notre Dame's defense looks spectacular, particularly the secondary. The Irish's 29 takeaways are tied with Texas and James Madison for the national lead.
Unless Stockton starts winging all over the field, whoever runs the ball better should be able to win.
In Georgia's favor, four of college football's top eight defenses advance to the second round: Ohio State (No. 1), Texas (No. 3), Penn State (No. 4) and Notre Dame (No. 8). Georgia (No. 9 in total defense) makes it five of the top 10 in the quarterfinals.
Peach Bowl: (5) Texas vs. (4) Arizona State
In the championship-or-bust department, Texas just beat its first currently ranked team this season. Yep, that's right. Though Michigan, Oklahoma and Texas A&M have fallen out, in part, because of losing to Texas.
That's obscuring the fact Texas didn't blink in its first game ever against Clemson. Remember way back to those season-ending injuries to tailbacks C.J. Baxter and Christian Clark? Not a problem. Texas rushed for a season-high 292 yards against the Tigers. Jaydon Blue and Quintrevion Wisner each surpassed 100, scoring four combined touchdowns.
That's with two offensive linemen being knocked out on consecutive plays. (Wisner sustained a knee injury as well and was held out for precautionary reasons.)
The defense had given up four touchdown passes all season. It gave up three to Clemson QB Cade Klubnik. We'll see what Arizona State's Sam Leavitt can do in the Peach Bowl quarterfinal. Be forewarned, though: this is not a good matchup for the Sun Devils. The Longhorns are literally bigger and faster. That should be enough
Fiesta Bowl: (6) Penn State vs. (3) Boise State
Boise State finally gets its shot at a national title run at the site of some of its greatest triumphs: University of Phoenix Stadium in the Fiesta Bowl quarterfinal. (See the 2007 and 2010 Fiesta Bowls.)
Unfortunately for the Broncos, that venue is also still part of what might be the easiest CFP road remaining for Penn State. The Lions beat only their second ranked team of the season in routing SMU.
The Penn State defense deserves some credit for snagging three Kevin Jennings interceptions (including two pick sixes) that looked more gift-wrapped than that bad Christmas sweater from your aunt. Now comes the hard part for coach James Franklin, who, if you have to be reminded, is 3-19 against top-10 teams. The AP poll says Boise State is ranked No. 8.
Indoors, on turf, you have to like Penn State's chances. The defense that snuffed out just about everyone but Oregon has to concentrate on slowing down Ashton Jeanty and making Maddux Madsen a thrower.
Meet Abdul Carter, Maddux.
The CFP's first round turned out to be the Great Redeemer. Programs that were harboring high anxiety needed to flush demons. In historic, on-campus settings, each of the favorites did. No upsets, but plenty of mental remodels. Now, it's up to those winners to take it a step further, because bowing out in the quarterfinals isn't going to cut it for any of this weekend's winners who sport a combined 23 natties.
And Lane, please, take a breather. The quarterfinals are bigger than you.
